Being in a relationship is not easy. I can personally vouch for that. Once the honeymoon period is over, a sense of comfort sets in that the other person isn’t really going anywhere. And that’s when things begin to go wrong. We stop appreciating each other. We stop noticing each other. We stop caring about the other. It doesn’t mean we don’t love our partners. It just means we start taking them for granted.
And that is the biggest mistake most of us make in our relationships.
It’s not about the big honeymoon (though that was awesome!). Or the fancy dinners (though they are also appreciated!). Or even the expensive presents (please don’t stop!). What makes a relationship stronger is the little, everyday things that cost hardly anything.
Here is a list of things that my partner and I did that changed our relationship for the better. It is not a prescription, but it does give you a nudge in the direction you might want to take to improve your relationship with your partner.
- Make up
Fighting happens in every relationship. In fact, according to Lifehack.org, fighting is actually good for you. You need to lance the boil to let it heal. After the screaming, stomping, crying etc., sit down and talk it out. Get to the bottom of the problem and resolve it. Compromise. Apologize. Acknowledge the problem as well as fault. And most importantly, respect each other no matter what.
- Do something special for your partner.
When we were dating, I could afford to buy my partner little somethings as a token of affection. Now, with the baby, I had to stop working full time. We live on a single income and I while I get some freelance writing assignments, I can’t splurge like I used to.
So I cook him his favorite meals as surprise dinners, or breakfast in bed, or something special in his lunchbox for work. They’re healthy, made with love and he appreciates the effort I make.
He, in turn, will give me time out from housework and the baby. Some days, he won’t wake me up and just let me sleep in while he takes care of the baby. Or he’ll let me get some me time to just – relax.
- Find Time for Each Other – No Matter What
I love DC and Marvel comics – huge geek that way. He makes an effort to learn about the superhero universe so we can talk and watch the latest superhero blockbusters together.
He was always passionate about cryptocurrencies. I couldn’t care less. But for his sake, I learned about cryptocurrencies and got hooked to the subject.
After the baby was put to sleep, we would sit down (we still do) and chat about what interested us (comics and cryptocurrencies!). We even bought matching t-shirts that we found on Amazon.com. He’s an Ethereum enthusiast, and I am a Bitcoin freak. I got him a black Ethereum t-shirt and he got me a heather grey Bitcoin t-shirt.
We laugh about it, but it kind of is like our pledge to each other to be interested in each other.
It is important that you genuinely appreciate each other. If you can’t see the beauty in your partner, then they might stop seeing it in themselves too.
There is so much more that I could write but there isn’t enough space. Here is a nice list of things you can do to make your partner happy: 10 Things to Keep Your Partner Happy.